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What a Friend
What To Do When You're Overwhelmed
Maron Gaffron | Apr 14, 2025
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Message Transcript

“Are we weak and heavy laden?

Cumbered with a load of care?

Precious Savior still our refuge,

Take it to the Lord in prayer!

Do thy friends despise, forsake thee?

Take it to the Lord in prayer.

In His arms He’ll take and shield thee.

Thou wilt find a solace there!”

Good morning! If you have your Bibles, would you turn with me to

Mark chapter 9. We’ll be looking at page 838 if you’re using a house Bible.

Today we’re wrapping up our 3 week series all about prayer.

Throughout this series we’ve used Joseph Scriven’s poem, turned

hymn, as our discussion guide to help us frame our conversation about

prayer, and rediscover the divine privilege that is ours in Christ Jesus:

**That we have been personally invited to enter into an ongoing

conversation with the Lord Most High, Almighty God. Creator of the

Universe, the lamb that was slain, the lion of Judah, Immanuel,

***God with us, The God who calls us “friend.” -

We have been given the divine privilege of being able to talk to our

friend - anywhere, anytime, and about anything.

And this divine invitation to prayer is the primary subject of Joseph

Scriven’s most famous poem.

In week one we learned that the hymn we know as “What a friend we

have in Jesus” wasn’t intended to be a hymn at all. It was written as a poem

originally titled “Pray Without Ceasing.” And we can see a thread woven

throughout all 3 verses of this poem, encouraging us to pray - to carry

everything to God in prayer - to take it - whatever it is - to the Lord in

prayer.

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The author of this poem, Joseph Scriven, did not have an easy life. He

suffered the tragic loss of not one, but 2 fiances. Twice he had been engaged

to be married, but each promising and hopeful engagement ended in

tragedy. His first fiance passed away just hours before their wedding day

from an accidental drowning, and his second fiance died from pneumonia

just a few weeks before what would have been their wedding day!

Joseph Scriven also suffered physically, from various illnesses, and

often went through bouts of deep depression.

But somehow, through all the pain and loneliness he experienced, his

legacy remains one of enduring faith and unwavering belief in the constant

and abiding friendship of Jesus.

What a friend we have in Jesus.

Throughout this series, we’ve wondered out loud why this simple and

repetitive poem has remained a universally beloved hymn?!

● How has it managed to stay relevant across generations?

I think there are 3 reasons why we’re still singing this song, 170 years

later: Because:

It's true. It’s authentic. And it’s vulnerable.

Its message is true. As we’ve seen over the past 2 weeks of this

series, the claims made by Joseph Scriven’s poem about the character of

God:

● That He is a close friend, who knows our every weakness.

● That He bore our sins, carries our grief and shares our

sorrows.

● That He is faithful, He is our refuge, our comfort and our shield!


These declarations about who Jesus is are anchored in Scripture and

they point to the truth of God’s character.

For nearly 200 years, billions of people worldwide have been able to

bear witness to these truths, saying “Yes, and amen! What was true for

Joseph Scriven has been true for me as well!

● He has carried me through my deepest valleys, and comforted

me in my sorrows - yes and amen!

● He has freed me from my guilt and shame. He’s my shield and

defender! Yes and amen!

● He knows my every weakness and yet He welcomes me as a

friend!

● He is so faithful, my refuge and strength!”

Hallelujah, yes and amen! The song still rings true for so many of us,

for those of us who know him as our trusted friend. We who have

experienced his love - we bear witness to these truths - saying Yes and

amen! The poem continues to stand the test of time because the truths it

holds are timeless!

Timeless and relatable. It’s true and it’s authentic.

It’s REAL TALK. It’s in the language of the people. Simple, common

language. I think one of the reasons we’re still singing it is frankly, because

we can understand it!

When my kids were little, they went to a Lutheran elementary school.

And one of my favorite elements of their school week was the mid-week

chapel service. Every Wednesday morning little Jaden had to wear a tie, and

little Desi was forced into a plaid skirt, and they went into this very

European, medieval looking chapel, where they sang hymns - AND ONLY

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HYMNS, to the ominous sounds of a gigantic pipe organ! These Lutherans

were some serious folk!

And this was an old school, Missouri Synod Lutheran Church, if you

know you know! This was as old school as it gets! But I loved it because

they were teaching my kids old songs. And my kids grew to love these

songs, and they’d sing them around the house:

“What kind of love is this? What kind of love is this?

To show your love, Jesus there to me on Calvary?

What kind of love is this? What kind of love is this?

Some of the more repetitive and prayerful hymns my kids learned at

that school are still family favorites to this day. Desi’s favorite hymn she

learned in school just happens to be “What a friend we have in Jesus!”

But they also learned this classic Lutheran Hymn:

A mighty Fortress is our God

A Bulwark never failing

Our Helper He amid the flood

Of mortal ills prevailing

For still our ancient foe

Doth seek to work us woe

His craft and power are great

And armed with cruel and hate

On earth is not his equal

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That song didn’t really catch on with my kids… Didn’t quite capture

their hearts! The language is too lofty, it doesn’t flow in a way that’s easy to

understand. Nobody says ‘Bulwark’ anymore!

Not only that, but half of that spritely verse is postulating about the

cruelty of the Devil, not the tender love and friendship of Jesus!

Martin Luther’s “A mighty fortress is our God” is more head than

heart. Whereas Scriven’s poem is all heart - it’s truthful, authentic, AND it’s

vulnerable.

Now I mentioned a few weeks ago that I was able to find an original

copy of the poem written in Scriven’s own hand in a library archive online.

Original manuscript.jpg

As I got down to the 3rd verse, the verse we’re focusing on today, I

noticed that it says something very different than the version I grew up with.

Instead of “are we weak and heavy laden? Cumbered with a load of care…”

What Scriven actually wrote was this:

Are we cold and unbelieving? Cumbered with a load of care.

Here the Lord is still our refuge. Take it to the Lord in prayer!

“Are we cold and unbelieving?”

This has to be one of the most vulnerable and honest lyrics I’ve ever

encountered. Ever. Because ‘belief’ is at the very foundation of Christianity!

Belief is essential to being a Christian - it’s why we’re called ‘believers.’ And

because belief is at the core of who we are as Christians, not many of us are

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willing to admit when we’re struggling to hold on to our belief. When we’re

questioning our faith. And even fewer of us are writing poems about it!

Last week, Dr. Milton Keys asked the question, “What’s wrong with

Joseph Scriven?!” How could a man who suffered loss after heart-breaking

loss, talk about how good it is to be able to take everything to God in prayer!

I’m sure he prayed when his beloved Eliza fell ill with pneumonia. I’m sure

he prayed for mercy. I’m sure he prayed for her to live, but she died! So how

do you turn to God when it seems like your prayers haven’t been answered?

When your faith is rocked? When you’re so broken that you’re struggling to

believe?

Joseph Scriven is writing from this most vulnerable place, confessing

that there was a point in his life where he had reached a level of grief so

debilitating that it denied him the ability to believe!

Are we cold and unbelieving? Cumbered with a load of care?

Joseph Scriven is bearing his soul with these words - truthfully,

authentically, and vulnerably! This song is his autobiography. And verse

3 is his confession.

It’s no wonder he hid this poem in his nightstand. It’s no wonder the

only person he trusted with these words was his own mother!

Because what he’s really saying is this:

“There was a time when I struggled to believe! When I felt the weight

of the world on my shoulders. I was crushed by disappointment, sorrow after

sorrow - again and again, to the point where I felt cold and unbelieving! This

happened to me! I lived it - and you know what I discovered?

Here the Lord is still our refuge.

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At rock bottom. In the darkness. When I was cold toward him and

unbelieving - even there - even in that hopeless state, when I felt far from

him, when I felt angry with him, when I doubted his goodness, when I

couldn’t see him, couldn’t hear him, didn’t want to go near him, when I

didn’t want him - when I was COLD and unbelieving - still He sheltered

me. He opened His arms to me and comforted me.

He wasn’t put off by my unbelief. On the contrary: Here the Lord was

still my refuge - my safe place - my light in the tunnel - and I learned that

I really could take everything to the Lord in prayer - even my unbelief!”

What a mind-blowingly gracious God!

Do you know that you don’t have to clean yourself up first to be able to go

to your father in prayer? You don’t have to pump yourself up intellectually, or

attain a certain level of faith first? Do you know that you can go to him just

as you are, right now? That you can even bring Him your unbelief and say,

“here, Lord. What do I do with this?”

In Mark chapter 9, we read the story of an honest prayer, uttered in

desperation, by a skeptical father in need of a miracle.

Chapter 9 begins with Mark’s account of the Transfiguration. This is when

Jesus essentially went hiking with his 3 closest friends, and when they made

it to the top of the mountain, something miraculous happened. Now, we

don’t have time to get into all of that this morning, but just know, the

Transfiguration of Jesus is what preceded this event in Mark 9:14. Jesus and

a few of his disciples have just come down from the mountain top, and

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they’re now looking to join up with the other disciples. So read along with

me in Mark 9 starting at verse 14:

Mark 9:14-29

14 When they returned to the other disciples, they saw a large crowd surrounding

them, and some teachers of religious law were arguing with them. 15 When the crowd

saw Jesus, they were overwhelmed with awe, and they ran to greet him.

16 “What is all this arguing about?” Jesus asked.

Now I’m going to pause here, because Jesus asks a question. He says

‘What’s this arguing about?’ And I'm always puzzled when the Lord of the

Universe asks a question! He’s Jesus the Son of God, doesn’t he already

know? And if He already knows then why does He ask?

It’s true that Jesus could have interrupted the argument between his

disciples and the religious teachers, with some sort of cosmic mic drop. But

he doesn’t do that. Because he’s a master communicator, and good

communicators actively ask questions! Jesus asked no less than 307

questions in the gospels! He knows how to start a conversation. He knows

how to encourage dialogue.

And, as he tells us in Matthew 11:29, He’s humble and gentle at heart.

He doesn’t arrogantly insert himself into the middle of this argument. He

simply asks a question, to initiate a conversation, respectfully and

graciously.

And He still does that today! Have you ever felt a question pop into

your head, like a sudden thought that came from somewhere outside of you?

I was talking to someone earlier this week who was sharing a story from her

life, about a time when she sensed that God was asking her a question. And

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for her, this was a question that revealed what was in her soul. A gentle

prompt, a question that popped into her head, that was asking her to look

deeply at the condition of her own heart. A question that revealed her

deepest longings, and radically changed the course of her life. God asked her

a question.

Last week, Milton said that:

Prayer is a conversation with God.

Pay attention to how Jesus speaks, when you’re reading the red letters, as in

Mark chapter 9. He asks questions. As you pray, as you talk to him -

remember that prayer is a conversation, not a monologue. And listen. Not

for some audible voice. Maybe listen for a thought that seems to come from

outside of you. We often call this the ‘still, small voice’ of God. What

questions might He be asking you?

We continue in verse 17:

17 One of the men in the crowd spoke up and said, “Teacher, I brought my son so you

could heal him. He is possessed by an evil spirit that won’t let him talk. 18 And

whenever this spirit seizes him, it throws him violently to the ground. Then he foams at

the mouth and grinds his teeth and becomes rigid. So I asked your disciples to cast out

the evil spirit, but they couldn’t do it.”

19 Jesus said to them,[e] “You faithless people! How long must I be with you? How long

must I put up with you? Bring the boy to me.”

20 So they brought the boy. But when the evil spirit saw Jesus, it threw the child into a

violent convulsion, and he fell to the ground, writhing and foaming at the mouth.

21 “How long has this been happening?” Jesus asked the boy’s father.

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He replied, “Since he was a little boy. The spirit often throws him into the fire or into

water, trying to kill him. Have mercy on us and help us, if you can.”

… If you can. The father had already been let down when the disciples were

unsuccessful in their attempts to deliver the boy from the evil spirit. And

let's be clear here, we’re talking about an evil spirit. I know this sounds like

epilepsy to us, but ancient people knew the difference. Matthew 4:24 clearly

distinguishes the 2 as separate issues. This boy, the father says, is being

tortured by an evil spirit that is trying to destroy him, often throwing him

into the fire, or into water, trying to kill him! This is a matter of life or death,

and the desperate father pleads, “Have mercy on us and help us if you can.”

Jesus responds in verse 23:

23 “What do you mean, ‘If I can’?” Jesus asked. “Anything is possible if a person

believes.”

And now we come to one of the most truthful, authentic and vulnerable

prayers in the whole of the Bible:

24 The father instantly cried out, “I do believe, but help me overcome my unbelief!”

I do believe, but help me overcome my unbelief! I wonder how many of us

have been there before, believing - but still wrestling with our unbelief. I

wonder how many of us are there right now?

25 When Jesus saw that the crowd of onlookers was growing, he rebuked the evil[f]

spirit. “Listen, you spirit that makes this boy unable to hear and speak,” he said. “I

command you to come out of this child and never enter him again!”

26 Then the spirit screamed and threw the boy into another violent convulsion and left

him. The boy appeared to be dead. A murmur ran through the crowd as people said,

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“He’s dead.” But Jesus took him by the hand and helped him to his feet, and he stood

up.

28 Afterward, when Jesus was alone in the house with his disciples, they asked him,

“Why couldn’t we cast out that evil spirit?”

29 Jesus replied, “This kind can be cast out only by prayer.”

A desperate father in desperate need, who just like Joseph Scriven was

struggling to believe, brought himself, his whole self, doubts and all, to

Jesus, crying out, "I do believe, but help me overcome my unbelief!”

He prayed to Jesus: "I do believe, but help me overcome my

unbelief!”

And Jesus. Did not. Condemn him. He didn’t reject the father’s

truthful, authentic and vulnerable prayer! He didn’t punish or shame him for

his unbelief. Jesus had compassion for him. He cared for him.

Are we cold and unbelieving?

Here the Lord is still our refuge.

Throughout this series, we’ve kept coming back to this quote from Eugene

Peterson:

Prayers are tools, but with this clarification: Prayers are not tools for

doing or getting, but for being and becoming.” - Eugene Peterson

That father in Mark chapter 9 cried out: Help my unbelief.

Help me be a person who believes more fully.

Help me be a person who believes.

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Help me be.

Help me become a person who believes wholeheartedly!

Help me become a person who believes.

Help me become.

Prayers are tools for being and becoming.

Becoming more like Jesus. The only way to become more like Jesus is

to practice his presence, praying prayers that are truthful, authentic, and

vulnerable.

Being more like Jesus means bringing our whole selves to God in

prayer - holding nothing back from Him! Not even the parts we think we

shouldn’t have, not even the embarrassing parts, or the parts we think will

upset God. No. It is our divine privilege to carry EVERYTHING TO GOD in

prayer.

I want to be and become more like Jesus. Therefore, I pray about

everything!

I want to know Jesus! And the only way to know him is to spend time

with him! To practice His presence again and again! To talk to him. To listen

for him. To read his words and let them percolate in my mind and drip into

my heart, until they become part of me. Until they fill my heart and come

out of my mouth. Until I think like Jesus, talk like Jesus, live like Jesus, and

love others like Jesus did! Prayers are not tools for doing or getting, but for

being and becoming.”

This series has been an invitation to all of us to pray. To talk to God and to

listen for his voice! Psalm 27:8 says

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8 My heart has heard you say, “Come and talk with me.”

And my heart responds, “LORD, I am coming.”

Psalm 27:7-8

That’s the invitation: “Come and talk with me.” He invites us to pray,

he invites us to come to him. But don’t misunderstand His invitation. Prayer

is essential to the life of a Christian just as it was essential to the life of

Christ, himself! Jesus is our model, and he prayed to his father constantly!

Prayer is not something we can choose to do or not to do - it isn’t an

option. We. Must. Pray. “My heart has heard you say, ‘come and talk with

me.’” My heart has heard you say “COME!” When my kids were little, and I

would tell them to ‘come here’ - they knew I wasn’t just inviting them to

come to me, I wasn’t suggesting they come to me, I was TELLING them to

come! You, come here! I loved them and I had authority over them - and

they obeyed.

Our loving Father is saying to each one of us, “come and talk with me.”

“You. Come here.”

Prayer is not an option. Prayer is obedience.

8 My heart has heard you say, “Come and talk with me.”

And my heart responds, “LORD, I am coming.”

Psalm 27:7-8

Jesus was constantly stealing away to be alone with His Father. He

modeled for us a way of life that was centered around prayer.

1 Thessalonians 5:17 tells us to “pray without ceasing” or “Don’t stop

praying.” And that seems so aspirational, so unattainable. Practically

speaking, how on earth are we supposed to do that?

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For me, it looks like this: I’m a worrier. I’m a heavy thinker. I am

constantly thinking. But as my friend Lisa Santee told me a few weeks ago,

one easy way to establish a life that is centered around prayer is to:

Exchange your thoughts for prayers.

Exchange your thoughts for prayers.

When I’m worried about something, instead of spiraling and letting my

thoughts run wild with every possible worst case scenario, I will take hold of

those anxious thoughts and turn them into prayers.

History is full of examples of prayers like that. Throughout the Psalms,

we see every kind of thought, good, bad and ugly, being exchanged, or

transformed into truthful, authentic, and vulnerable prayers. Joseph

Scriven’s poem is exactly this - imploring us to exchange our thoughts for

prayer.

And for some of you, if you tend to have trouble putting your thoughts

into words, for some of you, it may help to pray someone else’s prayer!

There is a rich tradition throughout Christian history, of our spiritual

ancestors putting their truthful, authentic, and vulnerable prayers into

words. Like this one from Thomas Merton. He was a theologian, scholar,

poet, and monk, who exchanged his thoughts for prayers this way when he

prayed:

Thomasmerton.jpg

My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead

of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know

myself, and the fact that I think I am following Your will does not mean that

I am actually doing so.

15

But I believe that the desire to please You does in fact please You. And I

hope I have that desire in all that I am doing. I hope that I will never do

anything apart from that desire.

And I know that, if I do this, You will lead me by the right road, though I

may know nothing about it. Therefore I will trust You always though I may

seem to be lost and in the shadow of death. I will not fear, for You are ever

with me, and You will never leave me to face my perils alone.

Amen.

Exchange your thoughts for prayers. “My Lord, I have no idea where I’m

going…” That is a truthful, authentic, and vulnerable prayer. Exchange your

thoughts for prayers.

What are you thinking about these days? What’s on your mind? What keeps

you awake at night? What are you wrestling with? What’s going well that

you’re thankful for? What’s not going well? What questions are you asking

yourself? What questions might God be asking you?

Go ahead and be truthful, authentic, and vulnerable in your prayers. No

need for fancy words. Just bring your whole self to God.

Is something stressing you out? - take it to the Lord in prayer.

Are you rejoicing? Is there something to celebrate? - take it to the Lord in

prayer.

Are you grieving? - take it to the Lord in prayer.

Are you angry? Are you confused? Are you disappointed? - Take it to the

Lord in prayer

Are you weak and heavy laden - Take it to the Lord in prayer!

Are you cold and unbelieving? Cumbered with a load of care?

16

Here the Lord is still your refuge! Take it to the Lord in prayer! Jesus said:

“Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I

will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because

I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”

Matthew 11:28-29

Come to me. .. Jesus said. Come to me.

8 My heart has heard you say, “Come and talk with me.”

And my heart responds, “LORD, I am coming.”

Psalm 27:7-8

We’re going to move into a time of prayer. But before we do that, I’ve asked

my son to close this series with one of his own truthful, authentic and

vulnerable prayers.

I heard him working on this song a few weeks ago, and I thought it was

absolutely beautiful, but to my complete surprise, when I asked him if he

had a name for his new song, he said he was just going to call it, “Prayer

Song.”

He wasn’t just singing or writing, he was praying.

While I was studying for this prayer series, reading books about prayer, and

filling my head with all kinds of information about prayer - my son was

quietly living a life of prayer. Truthfully, authentically, and vulnerably.

Let it inspire you to pray. Talk to God. I don’t care if you speak your prayers,

sing your prayers, dance your prayers, go on prayer walks, use your

commute to pray, pray while you’re mowing the lawn, pray in the morning,

pray before bed. Just pray - talk to God - in a way that is truthful, authentic,

and vulnerable. Rediscover again and again what a privilege it is to carry

everything to God in prayer.

Jesus invites you, saying ‘come to me.’ May your heart ever respond, “Lord,

I am coming.”

Other Messages In This Series

What a Friend What a Friend We Have in Jesus

Maron Gaffron - March 30, 2025

What a Friend Have we trials and temptations?

Milton Keys - April 06, 2025
5504 E. 146th St.
Noblesville, IN 46062

317.848.2722
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